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Pre-Marriage

Posted in Uncategorised

One of the most important decisions and choices that a person makes in their lifetime is who to marry. Whether or not you are happily married will dictate the entire course of your life. It will measure the flow of your days, how well it will be with your children and even how you see life in general. Truthfully, you will carry your marriage with you everywhere you go. It is commonly said that marriage will either “MAKE” or “MAR” you.

The Following Are Also Included in This Section:

a.) Pre-Marital Sex 

b.) Important Things to Consider 

c.) Ways of Getting Married 

 

Pre-Marital Sex

One of the problems that plaque couples who indulged in pre-marital sex is that of trust. In order to avoid all the complications that may arise out of this issue, it is important to detest any form of fornication. It is always great to set boundaries during this period. “HOW FAR IS TOO FAR?”

 

HERE ARE SOME HELPFUL HINTS

  • Avoid hugging, holding and kissing.
  • Don’t sit on his lap.
  • Don’t stay indoors alone with your beloved for long periods.
  • Don’t be alone in isolated places at odd hours.
  • Don’t put your hands under the skirt or through the flap.
  • Don’t sleep/lie on the same bed with your beloved.
  • Don’t undress in the presence of your beloved.
  • Don’t fondle the breasts, vagina and penis.
  • Don’t have sex with your beloved (that is fornication)!

 

Important Things to Consider When Choosing a Marriage Partner

-      The fact that the parents are good does not mean the child will also be a good spouse.  Is he/she committed to God?

-      Don’t marry just because your parents say so.  Is your intended partner your friend?

-      If you marry too early you will miss out on certain things in life (e.g. your youth, your time of being single and free).

-      Consider the fact that people do not really change and so anything that you do not like about your beloved and therefore spouse is also not likely to change.

-      Will you be in a position to manage financially?

-      Will you have a place to stay when you marry?

-      Cultural differences are going to affect your marriage.

-      Disparity in levels of education will also affect your marriage.

-      Before beginning pre-marital counseling it is always helpful for the relationship to be official recognized by the Church.

 

Facts that can be discovered through the Official Recognition of the Relationship

  • Name and age of both the man and woman.
  • Date the relationship began.
  • How long they have known each other.
  • Sickle cell status of both the man and woman. (Amongst Africans)
  • H.I.V. status of both the man and woman.
  • Any other medical condition e.g. Epilepsy, blood pressure, etc.
  • Educational background of both the man and woman.
  • Working experience of both the man and woman.
  • Parental knowledge and consent.
  • Tentative wedding date.

 

Openness

Trust is the bridge on which love rides. One of the things you will like to avoid in a marriage is what is known as “MARITAL SURPRISES”

Being open, naked or transparent is one of the key ways to avoid surprises, mistrust and suspicions.

There are 3 areas that one needs to be naked or transparent to each other before marriage:

  1. Historically e.g. past relationships, children
  2. Financially e.g. debts, income, assets, obligations.
  3. Spiritually e.g. aspirations in future, personal sins

 

Getting Married

Marriage is an institution ordained and ordered by God. It is the only institution that was established before sin came into the world.

Three Ways of Getting Married

 1.   Civil Marriage

(This is in accordance to the civil laws of the land.)

In most countries, the Marriage Ordinance prescribes that a certificate must be acquired from the local or municipal authority, granting a 3-month period during which a couple must be married after their names have been published at the Municipal/City Council or the church for three weeks.  If no one opposes the marriage within these three weeks, the marriage may take place.  It is a crime to marry again while still married under the Marriage Ordinance.

 

2.   Customary Marriage

(This is for the involvement of the families.)

Families get together and traditionally hand over their daughter after customary rites are performed.  The church does not recognize customary marriage as marriage unless it is blessed by the pastors.  Customary marriage is a polygamous arrangement. The church believes that it is important for its members to marry under the Marriage Ordinance because legal marriage under the Ordinance does not permit polygamy.

 

 3. Spiritual Marriage

(This is so that the couples vow to obey God’s law in relation to marriage and also to have the marriage sealed by God.)  The church conducts the vows and blesses the couple.  As far as the church is concerned, you are not married unless this is done.  It is highly recommended that couples fulfill all 3 forms of marriage to avoid confusion and dispute later on, as to whether they were or have indeed been married.

Extract from Model Marriage (best book on marriage counseling)

 

Site Map

Written by Super User on . Posted in Uncategorised

HOME (short intro (marriage between man and woman),

  • Widgets – Sexometer

                              Temperaments

                              Keeping it fresh daily nuggets

ABOUT (God's definition of marriage – five fold pattern of marriage from Model Marriage)

MARRIAGE TOPICS

  • Sex and intimacy
  • Family dynamics (in-laws, step children, adopted children, barrenness, pregnancy, bereavement)
  • Pre-marriage (pre-marital counselling, what you need to know before you get married – sex, finance, communication)
  • New marriage (Role of the husband, role of the wife, Honeymoon etc)
  • Hurting marriage (problem-solving in marriage, sex, finance, communication, forgiveness (forgiveness made easy))
  • Healthy marriage (Assorted principles)

DIVORCE

  • Chapter on divorce

COUNSELLING

  • The importance of counselling (pre and post), Seeking help for problems in marriage
  • Interactive chat

SPIRITUAL GROWTH

  • God as center of marriage (Chap. 6 Model marriage)

BOOKS

  • Top twenty

FAQS

  • Question and answer at back of model marriage

Slideset

Written by Super User on . Posted in Uncategorised

The Widgetkit Slideset takes your product showcase to the next level. It provides a sleek way to show multiple sets of items and uses smooth effects while looping through them.

Features

  • Clean and very lightweight code
  • Eye-catching transition effects
  • Support of named custom sets
  • Swipe navigation on mobile phones
  • Built with HTML5, CSS3, PHP 5.2+, and the latest jQuery version
  • Works with Joomla and WordPress

Slide Example

The sets are auto generated (4 items per set), item names are shown and it uses the slide effect and navigation buttons.

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Zoom Example

The sets are arranged manually, the sets names are used as navigation and it uses the zoom effect.

  • Icon 01
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  • Icon 07
  • Icon 08
  • Icon 09
  • Icon 10
  • Icon 12
  • Icon 12
  • Icon 13

Drops Example

The sets show the item names and it uses the drops effect and navigation buttons.

  • Icon 01
    Album 1
  • Icon 02
    Album 2
  • Icon 03
    Album 3
  • Icon 04
    Album 4
  • Icon 05
    Album 5
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    Album 7
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    Album 8
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    Album 10
  • Icon 12
    Album 11
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    Album 12

Deck Example

This auto generated sets uses prev/next buttons as navigation and the deck effect.

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How To Use

The Widgetkit Slideset takes full advantage of the very user-friendly Widgetkit administration user interface. You can create and manage all the slidesets and their different items in one place. After you have created a slideset you can load it anywhere on your website using shortcodes or the universal Widgetkit Joomla module or WordPress widget.

Accordion

Written by Super User on . Posted in Uncategorised

The Widgetkit Accordion enables you to display a set of items in a compact space, by clicking on each items header it expands or collapses it's content section.

Features

  • Clean and very lightweight code
  • Smooth transitions on content section toggle
  • Option to match automatically the height of varying content
  • Option to auto collapse or allow multiple opened items
  • Built with HTML5, CSS3, PHP 5.2+, and the latest jQuery version
  • Works with Joomla and WordPress

Example

Keeping it Fresh Daily Nuggets

Icon 01

Headline

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Slide 2

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Headline

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Slide 3

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Slide 4

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Headline

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How To Use

The Widgetkit Accordion lets you easily create and manage all the accordions contents through the user-friendly Widgetkit administration user interface. After you have created an accordion you can load it anywhere on your website using shortcodes or the universal Widgetkit Joomla module or WordPress widget.

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